|Type of paper:||Case study|
|Categories:||Relationship Interpersonal communication|
(1). The description of the development of the relationship with specific interactions that exemplified the stages
A. Coming together
As I was hanging out with my friends during the summer season, I met a group of friends whom I became attracted to start friendship ties. I did not know any of the three that I spotted and became attracted to them to initiate friendship ties. As my tradition, I like making new friends thus I had to approach the three individuals that I yearned to start new friendship ties. In spite of the fact that the three were seen to be utterly yoked, I had to try my way out to fit in their company (Knapp, Vangelisti & Caughlin, 2014). Therefore, I had to refine my mode of attracting their attention by introducing myself in a way showing that I needed a friendly conversation with the three.
As a way of enhancing friendship development, I had to extend my kindness by offering them a chance to enjoy some packs of soft drinks and snacks as friendship gifts (Kaplan et al., 2014). As I struggled to make my wish come true, I did what was my tradition, starting a talkative session that ends up initiating the urge of knowing each other better. Consequently, I began by telling the group my name and requested to hear their names too. As a way of appreciation, they decided to share out their identity to me hoping to make a good friendship relationship with me. I got interested more in one of them whose character, talkativeness and approachable skills alluded to my style and the kind of person I wished to befriend. Her name was Julia.
Since Julia coordinated the group cohesion as if she was the group leader and an enthusiastic associate, I had developed an urge to know her more than my speculations were. As a way of experimenting to learn the genuine character of Julia and her two friends, I decided to order some more soft drinks and snacks and engage in more fun moments. As we interacted, I began to by outlining my favorite moments, foods, places I have ever visited and all the things that I yearn to learn about people. Consequently, Julia joined the motion by outlining her favorite occasions, drinks, and foods (Kaplan et al., 2014). To my surprise, I realized that she loved fun moments with open-minded individuals and I happened to be open-minded. For that matter, I began to become concerned and asked why Nalia, one of the two friends of Julia why she was not comfortable with the snacks. She outlined that she was on dietary terms that she was aiming at cutting down on her weight. On the other hand, I had a chance to learn Julia's pet life. I got a chance to know much about different dog breeds, Rottweiler, German Shepherds, and Chihuahuas.
After a couple of weeks, we met with Julia and spent a day out at a nearby refreshment ground. As I liked listening to rock music, I asked her if she was comfortable asking for a special occasion at the restaurant to be playing rock music. She was satisfied with the offer. As I shared more about my life, dating woes, my current relationship, family life and college life, Julia also told me details about her family. She talked about her upbringing as a princess, daddy's only girl. We thereby exchanged contact details hoping to meet soon.
In the long run, we became more close to the point of knowing each other's friends. She met some of mine. I visited her with my close friend and had to discover that she was the best choice of a friend as she made me realize my strength in becoming a business partner. As we kept on visiting each other, she made me start investing in shares in various companies as a way of making a living (Kaplan et al., 2014). Indeed, she proved to be a real friend. Consequently, she even visited me more often to the point of making me leave my other friends early to meet her. Her cooking was amazing.
As time went by, we had to become partners in business with Julia. We decided to come together and plan for the next move in investing more even though with the little finances that we had. We also decided to involve more friends to our form of investments and decided to form a partnership of buying shares with available and growing companies. Our association was seen as a love affair but all in all, we were business partners, and only the incorporated friends knew it well.
B. Coming apart
Our friendship started toppling along the way when intimate ties split the business face of out friendship. It all began when Julia invited me over for a presentation she was having in her class. She had rehearsed day in day out. So we left for her presentation early that morning. However, midway through her lecture hall, I got a call from my brother that he was sick. My brother never calls on such things, so my intuition told me that this might have been serious. I explained to her the situation, excused myself and went to the hospital where he was admitted.
He was feeling lethargic and couldn't hold back his stool. He was diagnosed with a bacterial infection in his lower colon. I stayed over until his treatment was done. I left him in the evening feeling better and headed to the campus precincts. Later, I found Julia in her angry mood unable to talk to me. It is then that I realized that she had an intimate love intention with me, but unfortunately, I had a girlfriend and the best I wanted from her is friendship with purpose. I, therefore, saw no reason why she was angry at me.
The silence went on for some time to the point that we could not even talk of business matters. I realized that she was much pissed off. After several weeks, we could not dare cross that line to family stories. Also, the issue regarding the way forward of facilitating our business as shareholders became questionable as we rarely talked about it. We later lost track of records and never knew how to reclaim our position in investments and our former friendship.
About six two months later, Julia could not keep holding on to our partnership but broke away and never bothered to talk to me even on business matters after coming across my girlfriend. It was a let go situation since we could not even talk about investing anymore as partners. I, therefore, had to make a difference in life and learned that matters concerning business should be free from intimacy and too close friendship ties. She stopped coming to my place as frequently as she used to. I did not have the guts to visit her also. Our intimate moments came to a standstill. I tried occasional surprises but to no avail. I took her out to more luxurious places, showered her with gifts of all manners, but I was not getting back the feedback I expected.
She had made her resolve, and she called me one evening and told me we needed to talk. I was so confident we were going to fix all our issues once and for all. I felt excited. We had agreed to meet at the local hotel where we first had our date. She was wearing a black beautiful short dress, up to the high level. She wore the same design the first time we met back in the days. She looked more beautiful than she had been since we met. She was short and precise. She informed me that she had a man now and that our relationship was headed nowhere. I felt pissed off as I knew that we were only friends and business partners. I even thought that she was anticipating to meet me as a way of restructuring our business ties. It was then that I realized that she was utterly mistaken.
(2) Impressions after the first meeting of the person? What characteristics of the setting, individual, and conversations helped you form these impressions? 2. How did these impressions influence the next few meetings?
Impressions matter in establishing good communications. First impressions are always important, and they never change. The first twenty words you see, the first twenty steps, the first study of one's associative skills, honesty, dressing, all matter in creating a good first impression that establishes the baseline for the communication. The characteristic that made me start the kind of the relationship with Julia was the whole group's cohesion. At first, I wanted to be part of the group, but her unusual talkativeness and open-minded being made me get attracted and wished to befriend her. Also, she was well groomed and beautiful. She was acting as the moderator of the whole group. She switched conversations at ease, sometimes gracefully, sometimes even ferociously and Julia was a natural in conversing. Her body language exuded a lot of confidence. She always talked while staring at someone in the eye, the fact that I found attractive.
The setting in itself helped quicken the process of creating a rapport. People on a vacation ground are always there to make friends and have fun. It wasn't tricky striking a conversation between a group of men and a group of ladies whose sole intentions that a day out was meant to have fun. Such similarities in interests and given the group dynamics, it was easier to begin conversations.
The lady also made me get along her associative skills as she alluded to my vibes and ways of starting a conversation. She also portrayed sufficient initiation relationship skills as aired out by Knapp et al. (2014). Her flexibility in associating and interacting with new people influenced me to invite her on a date to a famous refreshment restaurant that enabled us to initiate our partnership.
3. How did these impressions change through the semester? Why? (3) What specific interaction sequences provided evidence that you and the other person developed a more extensive and more diverse repertoire of communication behaviors as the relationship progressed? 1. Provide examples for at least.
She was loud and inclined towards being an extrovert. When we met, I thought she was a party-loving kind of lady. I also expected her to be quite the drinker. I was not wrong about her being an extrovert. I came to realize that she loved to socialize meaninglessly with everybody around her. She would even engage the waiters at the hotels we would go out on a date at in conversations about anything. However, I got it all wrong on her drinking. She was not a drinker. She only drunk when we were out with friends or when we wanted to spice up our night with a cheesy role play. I realized that she just wanted me to get drunk so that she could be able to read my mind. According to Kaplan et al.'s (2014) coming together models, we initially used verbal cues to address most of our communication needs. As the relationship progressed, however, the proximity reduced and Julia became touchier and affectionate towards me. I understood her non-verbal cues a lot during the more advanced stages of our relationship.
According to Kaplan et al. (2014), the aspects that showed that we all had a repertoire interest was the way we all engaged in issues of experimentation as Julia also involved me in questions regarding my personal and private life. Those simple frowns, hand gestures, body movements and tonal variations and the information they conveyed became more apparent and discernible. For example, when she strokes her hair during a conversation, there was a need to re-explain a point I was making since it wasn't as bright. She talked in high tones when excited than average times. She always looked to the right for a long time to show disapproval of a subject.(4) What communication norms developed in your relationship? Use at least two theories as a framework for explaining how and why these norms established (e.g., social exchange theory, dialectic theory, social comparison theory, Schultz's theory of interpersonal needs).
Initially, our communications and interactions...
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