My Marriage and Family Relationships - Essay Example

Published: 2022-05-18
My Marriage and Family Relationships - Essay Example
Type of paper:  Essay
Categories:  Family
Pages: 7
Wordcount: 1889 words
16 min read

Family and marriage form the two fundamental institutions of interest in most societies thus drawing the attention of sociologists to understand our relationships. Marriage is a legally recognized social contract that exists between couples based on traditional and sexual relations implying a permanence of the union. Marriage and family have become the interests of sociologists because historically, marriage creates family thus forming an essential institution upon which the society procreates (Bott & Spillius, 2014). Both family and marriage create roles that are sanctioned by the community and breaking them is subject to punishment. The relationship between our family and our marriage is governed by the social norms, meaning it is attached to our cultural values. Also, life stages that we go through, plays a significant role in determining the linkage between the family and the life of couples. Therefore, the coupling between family and marriage depends on the stages of life, cultural aspects, stages of human growth and development, and gender roles as defined by society. My life in marriage can be used as an example when the discussion on Personal relationships and marriages arises. I was married at the age of 20 and now I am 35 years and leaving

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Marriage Stage and Family Relationships

We all go through different life stages marked by numerous rites of passage. Rituals are performed to signify the transition from one stage to another (Strong & Cohen, 2013). People understand these rituals with regard to participant available. Marriage is the most common rite passage in our society today. It is a rite of passage where two people bring their relationship to the public, permanent and official (Strong & Cohen, 2013). I did this fifteen years ago with my husband and we were bonded putatively to stay together forever at age. It is very difficult to walk through problems in marriage in a healthy manner mostly because stressor in most marriages emerges from different sources. Some of the sources include divorce, single parenting, job loss and many more (Adams, 1986). We encounter some of this problem in our marriage but we sail through successfully.

Money stressor is one of the major causes of stress between couples today. When they encounter money problems, dispute occurs on issues related to money (Scott, 2018). Money problem was also an issue in our marriage but we agreed not to give birth to another child to avoid expenses on daycare. Additionally, child raising issue can be a problem to children. Despite children being meaningful gifts in our lives, they can also bring stress in a marriage. Caretaking of children needs more responsibility from both parents. Stress like this causes strain and disagreement between couples and can even lead to time available for bonding couples (Scott, 2018). When we were blessed with one child eight years ago, I was afraid to take my son to expensive daycare. Due to shortage of money, my mother-in-law moved in to stay with us and help us until my child was six months. Single parenting can arise and it is an issue that faces most couples today. I faced this problem when my husband went back to school. It was difficult to run the house alone but I knew things would change after school.

Interventions in Family Life and Methods to Cope with a Crisis in Relationships

I believe that family crisis manifests through three stages which include, the onset, reorganization, and disorganization. The onset stage marks the beginning of the crisis and people may react through disbelief as to whether there is a crisis in the family. Shock and belief make it impossible for people to function or think compelling the victims to realize that there is a separation in the family. At the reorganization level, family members take action regarding the cause of the conflict (Debi, 2012). In most cases, family crisis results in divorce, family violence, single parenting, abuse and working parents. In an attempt to solve this problem, there is a need for developing applicable methods and interventions to avoid the severe consequences that may result from family conflicts.

The most experienced interventions in family life include death, unemployment, infidelity, substance abuse, and divorce. Whenever one of the family members has a physical or emotional illness, the effects spread to all family members and relatives. For instance, if an individual needs undergo an expensive treatment process, there is the likelihood that the entire family will bear the burden. The situation is worse in cases where one of the couples becomes ill leaving the other spouse to contact all the activities. In situations where one of the family members dies, the parents, couples, and relatives feel the effects (Clatterbaugh, 2018). Through experience, I acknowledge that death or divorce is just but some of the factors that contribute to single parenting in a family and specifically in the nuclear family. In my case, education and unemployment remained the most challenging issues in life. I had to carry the burden of performing home duties while my husband attended school. Only my mother-in-law was present to ensure that life did not become so much challenging to me. Such kind of life may be distressing and require immediate interventions to avoid the severe consequences.

Unemployment is a common problem experienced by couples and family members at large. Money brings love and joy in the family as it creates confidence to the couples and children that they will be in a position to fulfill their current and future needs. In circumstances where people fail to secure jobs, it may become challenging for them to experience happiness thus compelling them to take actions to cope with the problem (Clatterbaugh, 2018). The situation may be worse in cases where one of the couples has a job and attaches little significance to the family members. For instance, when my husband secured a job, I found it challenging to move with him since I did not have any job to do. However, since he is an understanding partner, the problem of unemployment did not haunt me for long and I avoided adverse effects that would result from that issue. Though unemployment contributes to divorce, substance abuse, and neglect of family roles, this does not always hold as family members can solve the stipulate rules to avoid such problems (Lin et al., 2016). My husband played a significant role in helping the family both financially and physically. However, in some cases, the community has to intervene to prevent the severe consequences of family interventions.

First, there is a need for training the members on the mechanisms they can apply to understand the indicators of family crisis. Family and marriage are essential structures of the society, and the community should assist couples in maintaining their alliance. In most cases, family crisis crop from the onset stage and failure to handle the issue at early stages complicates the problem (Lin et al., 2016). The signs can vary because they do not always manifest themselves through physical actions such as beating. However, they can take the form of abusive behavior designed to control the victims thus exposing them to emotional, verbal, and economic abuse. In such circumstances, the victims will be compelled to act thus bringing the crisis to the family. For instance, if the husband fails to offer financial and physical support to the wife and children, there is a high possibility that the family will break (Lin et al., 2016). Community education creates a path through which family members such as children, couples, and grandparents can identify the problems at early stages thus preventing the occurrence of following steps which may be severe. Through the application of this approach, I have been in a position to behave in an understanding manner to avoid the consequences of such behaviors.

At the individual level, the community should assist the victims to develop different inner aspects that may be helpful in helping the victim to cope with the situation. For example, acquiring a realistic perspective can be a viable way of adapting to failures interventions that occur in life (Debi, 2012). For example, when my husband was committed to education, I understood the fact and adopted alternatives means of survival to avoid distress. Similarly, my husband used to allocate some time to interact with family and acknowledge their importance. Such a value will compel the victim to prevent and take responsibilities at hand admitting that in future the problems will be solved. Continuous evaluation and assessment of the risks assist the family members in identifying the crisis at early stages thus preventing issues of divorce and drug abuse (Debi, 2012). If domestic violence originates from the abuse of drugs, stern measures should take place, and guidance and counseling can prove to sound in dealing with such issues.

Gender Roles in Marital Relationships and How They Evolve

Gender role has a significant role in today. However, the duties that men and women perform in marriage and family differ significantly depending on culture and the period of examining the family. In the colonial periods, gender roles determined whether the husband could be allowed to live the house without the presence of her husband (Botkin, week & Morris, 2000). During such periods, the husband played an essential role in working outside the home compound. As a result, a man acted as the breadwinner and had the opportunity to possess wealth and capitalism. On the other hand, traditional cultural attitudes and values regarding gender roles across all societies dictated that women should within the home compound and provide care to the children and husband (Neuman 2013). In this case, women appeared to be submissive and could only work by taking orders from the husband. From this view, gender roles could be classified as either traditional homemaker or breadwinner type of classification.

Living in the modern society, I witness that gender roles experienced in relationships is changing and new forms of gender roles continue cropping in the community. Traditionally, the society divided jobs depending on the values and attitudes towards gender roles (Neuman 2013). However, women continue cropping into the man's area of operation and women are increasingly take away work from unemployed men. In the contemporary culture, there is an emergence of new forms of relationships such as mixed and egalitarian type. In the former, women perform both house chores and regular jobs outside the home compounds (Clatterbaugh, 2018). For instance, my husband and I can perform any duty provided we reach an agreement. Though the wife may be formally employed, the nature of the job is less attracting than that of the men thus compelling them to perform both tasks. In the modern society, the family relationship is continuously changing leading to the development of egalitarian family structure where both couples have equal rights in the family.

Various movements and society aspects significantly contribute to the changing gender roles in the modern society. For instance, feminists groups and other women rights movements continuously advocate for the creation of a population in which both many and women have equal rights (Neuman 2013). The relationship cycle continues to evolve, and women are changing the traditional roles as such movements empower feminists to feel recognized in the society. The primary objectives of the actions are to improve the general feeling experienced by women where they appeared to be dominated by masculine in patriarchy societies (Dill & Zinn, 2016). Changing the opinions and attitudes towards forms the necessary approach for achieving equality.

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