I grew up in Guangdong at the southern coast of China, a son of a realtor and an only child till three years ago when my sibling brother was born. Life seemed promising amidst my father's busy schedules in his auspicious real estate business. Most of my days I had my mother in everything I did on my side as a confidant, a role model, source of courage, and inspiration in every challenge I faced. She believed in me. Life was good. My parents made every effort ensuring I got the best education and the best quality of life a kid my age needed. I was on top of the world.
As I grew up my mother was very supportive in helping me deal with the teen life crisis. Her gifted spirit in problem-solving gave me reassurance to soldier on. At certain instances when I came home from school discouraged over bury from my peers in school she had the right words to raise my spirit. I loved her natural resilience to life issues. I recall an incidence during my junior high school I came home very frustrated due to a misunderstanding with a friend. As usual, I presented my issues to mom and she helped me perceive the positive perception on the matter. To me, I felt that her golden heart was large enough to accommodate life challenges and draw the positive perceptions out of problems. My life was a happy one and everything seemed to be working in my favor. When I joined high school I left my comfort zone and traveled to Orlando as an exchange international student. Leaving my family was not easy for me. In the following days, I kept in touch with my parents on daily basis especially my mom to take an advantage of the encouraging advice she always gave me.
On my third semester after arriving in Orlando, I received the saddest phone call from my father on the demise of my mother. He told me that she had succumbed to illness. I was very devastated. It was during my end of semester examination so I was not able to travel for her burial. The void that remained in my life almost made me lose it all in life. I was never sure anymore on how to handle my situation especially the issue of my mother's death. Later I got comforting shoulders from my cousin and aunt who had moved into the neighborhood. Their entry into my life at these trying times became a blessing and a pain at the same time. Through them I got a new revelation of the cause of my mother's death, they enlighten me on how she had jumped off the building after marital problems with my father. They claimed that my father had another woman and issue my mother could not stomach prompting her to take her life. This new revelation brought anger and hatred towards my father, my stepmother and my three-year-old brother. I felt I was losing it all. I discontinued further communication to my immediate family and ignored my father's calls despite his continued attempts to reach out to me.
Life in the United State became frustrating in the homestay family where I was living. There were many lessons about family values I came to learn as I interacted with my hosts that I had taken for granted back in China. I started missing the closeness and interdependence we shared as a family. Through this period I was able to evaluate the options life gave to me all along. At this juncture, I realized I was judging my father harshly without knowing his side of the story.
I finally made that cutesy call to my father. He sounded very relieved upon hearing my voice. I made it clear for him on my intentions for the call and true to my instincts my judgment was harshly grounded. He clarified that my mother overreacted without understanding where he was coming from. He made it clear on his reasons for not telling me the truth in time due to the distance void between us. This time I knew that my father had my best interests at heart as always. I fell pity of the ordeal he went through in my silence and the misjudgment from the community that condemned him to murder my mother. Ever since I have grown fond of my little brother and enjoys his company whenever am visiting. The new found life gave me a new perspective on the family, more than having it all love, bondage, and togetherness. To this day I try findings probable answers on my mother's cause of action despite her strong role in my earlier life, especially on problem-solving skills. Am not judgmental on why she was not able to make her own solutions to the marital problem facing my family.
Hargie, O. Skilled Interpersonal Interaction: Research, Theory, and Practice. London: Routledge, 2011, 166.
Jacquette, D. (Art, Expression, Perception and Intentionality, Journal of Aesthetics and Phenomenology, 2014, 1(1), 63-90.
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